I suggest you treat
your lo.ved ones like you would
treat your friends. Think about it
for a moment. You would never
criticize, blame,
complain, nag,
threaten, punish or bribe your
friend. At least not if you plan to
be friends for long.
So why do you feel justified in
doing this to your loved ones?
People
try to force their partners to
behave in particular ways
because they believe if they can
only get their partner to conform
to their ideal, then things will be
right in the world. This idea
never works because our
attempts to control ultimately
provoke defensive reactions and
drive partners apart.”
In the relationships that work,
there are always two partners
who independently give up their
efforts to control one another.
And they do so without needing
the other to do so first (which
happens to just be another
attempt at trying to control.)
However, giving up your efforts
to control does not mean you
shouldn’t communicate your
interests and expectations to one
another. But it is very necessary to avoid emotional sentiments. Happy reading
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